Taking a Leap of Faith: Self-Reflection and Stepping Out on My Own…Finally

Hello all! Thanks for hanging in there with me! Sorry about the long absence, but I am happy to say that a lot of positive things have happened in the past few months. And by far, the most life changing thing was finally taking a leap of faith, and going full time with my freelance and creative business.

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To say I am terrified would be an understatement.

Now mind you, my safety net is limited. Actually, my safety net is non existent. Oh sure, I have a backup plan just in case it doesn’t work out. But I am trying my hardest to not even entertain the thought of it not working out. I am trying to channel all of that negative energy into investing, every day, into my business, into my passion, and into truly making a living by my art. And believe me, this decision did not come easy.

I mentioned before that I have been meandering in and out of the freelance business on a part time basis for several years, and I’ve had moderate success.  I’ve picked up lessons and figured out what to do and what not to do along the way. I’ve also managed to gain a clear focus on what I wanted to do with my business, and how I wanted to get there. And admittedly, working in the corporate world helped me figure out a better game plan. I’ve had the opportunity to work for some dynamic small businesses, and form personal relationships with business owners who are still deeply connected with their roots as young upstarts, trying the build themselves from the ground up. It has definitely been enlightening journey, and because of that, I’ve felt more ready than ever to really step out and follow my passion. But it really took an “A-ha!” moment to make the jump.

A few months ago, sitting at my desk at my corporate job in Midtown, feeling the same frustrations of monotony, craving more time with my family, ideas for paintings and drawings and…CREATING…in my head, I had some sort of an epiphany: I’d been working in the corporate world for close to 15 years, and I wasn’t excelling or growing in it. Not only  that, I was terribly bored with it. Why wasn’t I investing all of this time into a career that truly made me happy? The artistic work that I have done over the years proved that my skills were viable, and clients did find them suitable for their creative visions. Not only that, people enjoyed my original artwork. I’ve sold several paintings over the years, and in the back of my head, I’ve always known that if I invested real time into it, I could and would be wildly successful in the creative field.

WHAT WAS I WAITING FOR?

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My original plan was to resign in February, but fate and circumstances deemed my time of exit to be sooner, as in a week ago. Despite it all, I take it as a blessing in disguise, because who is to say  that I would have left the nest if I wasn’t forced out? Old fears could have crept back, and I would have been consumed with doubt and fallen right back into the safety zone, and the same pattern. Not this time. I don’t have the option to fail, and I have two big reasons why…IMAG0642

My family has, and always will be my biggest motivation to succeed. There’s a big part of me that wishes I had managed to build a thriving career long before my son was born, but then again, who is to say I would have the same motivation if he wasn’t here? One huge plus of my career path is that I can do most of it from my tiny home studio. I can make my own schedule, and I can be here for them in the best way I know how. I can be there to help with homework, cook a decent meal, go on school trips and events, and so forth. I am a true Libra, in the sense that I crave balance like air.  I need for my time to be distributed evenly between my work life and my family life. That is a balance that I just wasn’t able or allowed to get from my corporate job. And like I’ve said, I want to be motivation for Little Angel as he grows up. I want to show him that if you work hard and stay focused, you can accomplish anything you put your mind to. And don’t think Big Angel is left out of this. He is the main reason why I am able to venture down this path on so many levels. His blessing and his confidence in my abilities are enough to get me over any mountains of doubt. It is because of him that I have been granted this opportunity to pursue my dreams full time, and I am so grateful for that, and for him.

So with that, I look forward to this new path. I’ve already worked out a schedule, and my marketing efforts are in full swing. I’m looking forward to putting my many ideas into action, and growing in my field. And of course, the blog will be updated more often. Thank you all for your continuous support, and thank you for following my journey!

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